The habit of Mutual Benefit

The Habit of Mutual Benefit

“What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?” – George Eliot

Paradigm
· Ineffective: There is only so much, and the more you get, the less there is for me.
· Effective: There is plenty out there for everyone and more to spare

SEE – Principle – effective, long term relationship require mutual respect and benefit
Do – Behavior – Balance courage and consideration, seek mutual benefits,
create Win-Win agreements, Build win-win systems
Result - faster solutions to problems. More team involvement,
generosity of spirit and Rich relationship

Six Paradigms of human interaction

1. Win-Win: “Let’s find a solution that works for both of us”
People who choose to win and make sure others also win practice win –win, they search for solutions that will make them happy and simultaneously satisfy others

Characteristics
- Seek mutual benefits
- Is cooperative, not competitive
- Listens more, stays in communication longer,
And communicates with more courage


2. Win – Lose: “I’m going to beat you no matter what”
People with a win- lose paradigm are concerned with themselves first and last. They want to win and they want others to lose. They achieve success at the expense or exclusion of another’s success. They are driven by comparison, competition, position and power.

Characteristics
- Is very common scripting for most people
- Is the authoritarian approach
- Uses position, power, credentials, possessions, or personality to get the “win”

3. Lose- Win: “I always get stepped on”
People who choose to lose and let others win show high consideration, but lack the courage to express and act on their feelings and beliefs. They are easily intimidated and borrow strength from acceptance and popularity.

Characteristic
- Voices no standards, no demands, no expectations of anyone else
- Is quick to please or appease
- Buries a lot of feelings